here for you: presence in present

Have you ever felt just out of it? Like everything could be going swell and yet it’s like all the things that sparked joy seem a bit duller. Energetically lethargic, mentally unchallenged, and emotional spaghetti. 

In the awesome Michelle Yeoh movie that came out earlier this year, Everything Everywhere All At Once, Alpha Waymond hits the nail on the head when on this one. He strikes a chord with Evelyn when he says,

“Something is off. Your clothes never wear as well the next day. Your hair never falls in quite the same way. Even your coffee tastes wrong. Our institutions are crumbling. Nobody trusts their neighbor. And you stay up at night wondering…”

(Aiming for little to no spoilers here…) 

Evelyn looks up and whispers as though he has just spoken her soul out loud for the first time,

“...How can we get back?” 

Most things in life that are not dependent or commanded by God are a grasp for more control and control is rooted in pride. Actions coming from a place of seeking more control are typically rooted in fear. A fear that maybe God will not come through and so it would be easier to rely on yourself. And that control creates this illusion of safety, security, and stability. It’s what makes doing such an easy “failsafe” for go-getters and being an eternal marathon. You could be praying for a tree and to God that may look like a forest. Staying on this track is the fast track to getting the sapling in place of the tree in place of the forest. 

As a small business owner, mom, daughter, and wife, you see Evelyn going through everything. Everywhere. And all at once. As she backbends, scrambles, and caters her way through the years, you see how subtle, little moments make for big waves. 

For our high-achieving, fixer-uppers, what would happen if you just stop? 

To discover what will happen when you do just that can be overwhelming, deeply confronting, and an inflection point where there may be more comfort in making the decision rooted in fear rather than taking the plunge into a greater unknown. 

There’s an age old adage, a golden rule even, that from the moment you begin to play with others onwards, you treat others the way you want to be treated. And in moments where the pit may seem in greater focus than the fruit, it’s the ability to lean on your community for support that makes all the difference. 

As a prime example of someone with fixer upper tendencies, I know my first reaction is to find the solution and stick the landing. All too often the belief that telling someone else the faults or the problems we’re observing is to support troubleshooting. There’s a time and place for that. In actuality, what builds unity and connection is encouragement, hope + belief in another’s aspirations.  In moments where we’re feeling stuck, fearful, and unsure? We need cheerleaders, not naysayers. As an imperfect child of God, the response I crave is to be held. To know I’m not alone. 

Evelyn discovers this as she explores the essence of her being. It’s what Buzz Lightyear finds out from his new group of friends. He wants to show up as THE BUZZ LIGHTYEAR. All they want is for him to work with them as Buzz. 

In surrendering to the moment is to acknowledge that you are free from needing to keep it all together. If you’re a fixer upper without the answers for the moment, I’m encouraging you to sit with it. To submit them to God and to bask his stillness. To come to Him like you would want a friend and loved one to come to you. To remind you of who you are and the greatness in you when you might not remember if for yourself. 

So rather than needing to know all the answers now, drowning out the noise with other distractions, and/or tiring yourself out into exhaustion and isolation—pause + sit with it. There is a purpose for this point, pain, pressure. There is a peace that comes from meditating and simply being with Him. Feeling into His omnipresence and basking in the comfort of his arms. There’s no need for you to be Savior because He already is. 

At reclaiming abundance, we encourage our clients to write out their own “I am affirmations.” Inspired from the Book of Exodus, writing out your affirmations will support in reconnecting with your deeper self and speak who you are becoming into existence. Creating affirmations can be an essential pathway to creating a healthy and nourishing relationship with yourself.

In Exodus 3:13-14, Moses questions God’s plan over his life and his abilities to implement and execute his God-given assignment. Moses said to God, 

‘Suppose I go to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what shall I tell them?” God said to Moses, “I am who I am. This is what you say to the Israelites: ‘I am has sent me to you.”

By God’s grace, Moses goes on to part the Red Sea, pen the 10 Commandments, and deliver the Israelites from bondage and into the “promised land.” 

How you talk about yourself impacts how you feel about yourself. How you feel about yourself impacts how you treat yourself. How you treat yourself is how you treat others and how others will begin to treat you.

Because of Him, I am reminded that I am who I am because he is who He says he is. 

If you’re ready to embrace who you are right now + make space for all that you are becoming, you can schedule a 1:1 complimentary consultation here. 

Kim Yamasaki is a Christian wellness coach who supports her clients in cultivating space  + stillness in the mind, body, and Spirit through collaborative processes of co-creation. She provides services that create space _ stillness for deeper connection: spiritual wellness coaching for burnout, home organizing, and yoga. Her methods are affirming, grounding, and nurturing – all interlaced with playful creativity. She is a native Angeleno with Japanese and Chinese roots. 

This article was originally published for the  “selah space” newsletter, reclaiming abundance’s care package for go-getters. “Selah space” offers content to support readers looking to break the cycle of stress + burnout by living, loving, and learning deeply to be their most calm, confident, and complete selves. In the Bible, selah means “to pause or to reflect.” It appears  most heavily in the Book of Psalms and Habakkuk as musical notations at the end of verses to draw attention back to what was previously expressed.

References:

Transformation Church. (2022, August 14). Be Quiet and Listen  // What I’m Hearing Here (Part 2) // Brie Davis  [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxo1-OutbGs

Wong, H., & Caine, C. (2021). How (Not) to Save the World: The Truth About Revealing God’s Love to the People Right Next to You. Thomas Nelson.

Kwan, D., & Scheinert, D. (Directors). (2022). Everything Everywhere All at Once [Film]. A24.

MacLane, A. (Director). (2022). Lightyear [Film]. Walt Disney Pictures.